Can’t Fight This Feeling

It’s like no matter how well things have been going in my life or how well my days have been, I can’t fight the feeling of loneliness. I’ve been fighting this feeling for as long as I can remember, stemming all the way back to early childhood. I can remember being at family events and having no desire to interact with my cousins. I would find a spot in the corner and listen to the adults talk and sometimes interject my thoughts catching them off guard. Mainly, because I was child with intelligent answers to adult’s troubling questions, but more so because I was always around adults and really never with kids. I felt children were beneath me and I didn’t care for the silliness and young mindedness of them. All thoughts of a 4 yr old self. So I truly feel my disconnect with this world started before my time here but I’ll save that for another time.

Sadly, I can be in a room full of people and still feel lonely and left out. I just can’t truly connect with people and I don’t understand why. I’ve learned to entertain small talk and being a jokester at heart, I can keep a convo going but the feeling of loneliness never subsides. What is preventing me from connecting with people beyond the surface? Why can’t I have the same type of dialogues I have with myself in my own head with real people?

Since I’m always feeling disconnected from the 3D world and more in tune with the 4D and up worlds it affects my state of happiness in 3D. It’s like I can only stay happy for so long then the feeling of loneliness creeps back in, my mood changes and my vibes drop low. It’s a challenge everyday to keep my frequencies up. Being thankful and grateful for what I do have and don’t have helps, but then there’s days when I just have to let the loneliness win and let it run its course. Try not to attach to the feelings since they aren’t truly coming from me.

Feeling loneliness and disconnect for no reason at all are true signs that this matrix is doing its job. While here on this 3D plane we are bombarded with frequencies, images, music and chemicals that cause disharmony, self-doubt, loneliness, self-esteem issues and fear. Honestly, feeling these feelings is a reminder that we are separated from the Divine and need to find our way back. Back to oneness, wholeness and the dissolution of separation. People who can relate to what I’m talking about, knows these feelings and how out of place they are majority of the time. So, for those that know these feelings be grateful that you feel them because they are your reminder that you’re not of this world and just a visitor as well. Because in reality we are not alone or lonely, just stuck in our root chakra aka our lower self. We get stuck in this chakra by all those negative outside factors the matrix constantly bombards us with. Once you realize that the feeling of separation and loneliness is an illusion, you will start to work on yourself and finding your way back to the Divine.

You do this by learning your self through your own eyes and experiences. Removing the labels and goals that people placed on you all your life and finding your true and genuine likes and dislikes. Carving your own way within society or outside of society to get to the core of who you truly are. Showing gratitude in all that has happened to you and will continue to happen to you. By being on this internal quest for your true self, the rest of your chakras will ignite and open. Creating a bridge for the Divine to make its presents known in you and your surroundings. Raising your spirit’s frequencies so the Divine can lower itself aka your higher self aka your soul into your vessel, so you can operate in the material and spiritual realms….. the mundane and the quantum successfully! The way these physical vessels were originally created to be, portals between the material and spiritual.

With tuning yourself into the Divine, this opens you up to seeing the truth in all and the truth outside of this 3D matrix that is hidden from you. Seeing the truth of who you are, the magic encased in you and your power through your magic that can be used in the material and the spiritual realms. So,let the loneliness be your reminder that you are more than just this meat suit!

*PS – take all that resonates with you and leave what doesn’t.

Don’t Talk About It, Be About It

“Sa Sekhem Sahu”

This week has been a hectic one to say the least. I’ve been dealing with a neighbor issue and it escalated to the point where I went out and got a bat, pepper spray, stun gun and cameras. See, I know who I am and the power that I hold. But never once do I ever forget that I still have to function and make moves in this 3D mundane world. Accepting who and what I am has heightened me to no longer stand for anyone’s bullshit against me, my kids, my family or the things I value in this life. I’ve tapped into several past lives as a male warrior, military ops marksmen, warrior priestesses, warrior princess and several assassin runs on this realm, other realms, planets and dimensions. All I have to do is allow that fury and rage to rise and all I need to know and do will activate.

You may wonder if all of my blogs are about metaphysics, estoteric knowledge, spirituality and magic, why did I run out and get physical things to deal with my neighbor? Oh good question and the answer is I handled it in 2 ways! Firstly, I handled it metaphysically with magic then like I stated, I know I have to function in the 3D mundane, so I got some tools to throw down in the 3D if need be. Best believe I covered my bases. I don’t typically work with the dark arts, but if I have to due to being threatened I will. Threw they asses in a shit and piss jar and been shitting on them ever since they brought this mess to me!

The only reason I’m writing this blog is to let people know that claiming who you truly are spiritually, magically, etc isn’t for fakers and wannabes! You know the ones that as soon as some real shit come up in they life they completely forget who they are, their ancestors, the protection work and the tools they naturally have access to to take care of their problems in the unseen. Not once did I think “oh no, what am I going to do, or should I take their threats seriously or not, or maybe I should just call the police and let them handle it, or maybe if I ignore them and act like their words don’t hurt me they’ll stop”. Man Fuck That and that’s the same thing I told my husband when he didn’t want me to get all gangsta on they ass lol. I’m no punk in the higher realms or on this one. I cast first and ask questions later!

So best believe before I left my house today I stood in front of my altar and asked my ancestors and dragons to be with me as I put on my Eye of Ra necklace, put pepper spray in one pocket, and the taser in the other. Had my bat in the front seat of my car and my gun on the car door, because I am licensed to carry. Chitty, chitty bang bang only if my life and others are depending on it. I Don’t just Talk About It, I Be About It! Even though, they didn’t try me today doesn’t mean I let down my guard and not be ready to get down tomorrow or the next day. But even if they never step to me again, my workings are still doing their job in the unseen. Once again, bases covered!

Hail Sekhmet!

Connecting w/ Your Higher Self

I purposely did a meditation to gain insight from my Higher self while tapping into my inner temple. Below is the insight I gained when I tapped in that I was asked to share:

My Higher self took me and flew me out of the inner temple into the Beginning. The white static space, the binary codes beyond the void. We arrived at a “plane” outside of our universe and landed on this high plateau with a large lake in the distance. This plane exists in a different universe and my Higher self brought me there to show me that I’m from the beyond and this plane is where I’m from. The glow of the plane is purplish pink like a sunset sky. I ask my Higher self to become smaller due to being so tall the entity didn’t fit into my view. So my Higher self began to decrease in size.

My Higher self tells me that I, my current self, am my higher self in the future. My Higher self wanted to experience all that this universe was, so my Higher self had to “fall” into the dimensions to experience, to live beyond what was known and to learn about living/experience. My Higher self tells me that “time” is circular and I quote unquote time because it’s the only word I could use to describe what my Higher self said to me. Was also told that each soul rides a cosmic web and that web represents that’s souls “life” on that dimension during that placement on “times” circle. Each line that makes up the web are the decisions that soul can take. My Higher self tells me that it has come back several times as my current self to try out different decisions, to walk a different line aka timeline on the web. The decisions are countless because each situation has multiple decisions and you have multiple situations over your lifetime to encounter. So my Higher self has tried out different decisions aka walked different lines at different points on my web. Just like there can’t be a problem without a solution, there can’t be a decision without that timeline already existing. All decisions already have a path, that’s what destiny really means. You’re destined to take these paths and your decisions choose which paths you take.

Along with your cosmic web you are pre-destined to intertwine with certain beings and entities during your lifetimes. Either it’s a pack your Higher self makes from the beginning or a pack that develops over lifetimes with different beings and entities. Everyone you have a main encounter with in your life or they play a major part or role, you have a pack with. More importantly, your cosmic webs on each plane are intertwined.

My Higher self goes on and tells me, “You are bigger than this body. You radiate. Like radiation can change the cellular structure but in a damaging breakdown way, you radiate energy that builds up people and their genetics. You influence every one and everything around you and you’ve noticed it. You can create without even trying. So imagine what you could do if you radiated on purpose. That’s why your into genetics because you can easily manipulate it with no effort”.

Then my Higher self says, “This plane we’re currently on is huge, it’s not like earth. The boundaries are limitless here. I’m really not that big here because I’m not held in boundaries. That’s why it’s hard for you to be confined to this body and this world because it’s constricting you and keeping you in boundaries. You’re connected to me so you know what it feels like to be boundless. The lake looks big and very close to us, because you’re use to what you call on earth as perception or particular point of view to explain what you see when it challenges your senses. But actually it isn’t close at all, it just looks like it is because it’s so big. You come from the expanse and this plane is nothing but expanse”.

PS: This message isn’t just for me, it’s for all beings that have an eye to see. Connect to your higher self and learn who you truly are.

Karma Breaker

Coming into this world all knowing then losing yourself, your value, your path, your purpose is traumatic.

Being told from outsiders, seers, shamans, priestesses, and elders that you’re here to break rules, break karmas and bring back truth in your ancestry and in this world sounds awesome and empowering. To know that I have a dual duty of empowering myself and my lineage with the knowledge, wisdom and power I contain, sounds like some superhero shit.

But in reality it’s depressing and hard. It’s like knowing beforehand what’s going to happen and being cool with it. Thinking you can prepare for it and tell yourself to not lose sight of who you really are as motivation is cute. But when the chaos hits, the karma comes and the emotional rollercoaster comes roaring, it’s hard to feel like a powerful being. All that makes me human rises up and takes over. Heartache, pain, emotions, crying and crying, anger, defeat, giving up, running away and more crying.

Makes me wonder why me? Why do I have to be the one to the clear the crap out of our bloodline? A course when you ask questions like that you get answers. It’s because not only am I clearing out karma for myself and my ancestors, I’m also unleashing our birthright, power, ancestral practices and gifts, and reforming our direct link to abundance and prosperity our lineage on this earth have been disconnected from. All the things that were taken from us through murder, assassinations, witch hunts, slavery, brainwashing and our people erased from books and the memories of all people on earth.

Being reminded of what I and my lineage will be gaining from what I as an individual have to go through, helps me focus and pull myself together to push forward. Yes, these karma moments suck but I will get through them and be even stronger in my power and my will at the end of them.

Making my earthly and galactic ancestors proud!

Shadow Work is Subconscious Work

A person bumps into you and you have hot coffee in your hands and it spills all over you and it burns bad. Reacting to the pain of the burn is healthy. Reacting to the anger you have towards the person who caused this to happen to you, because it caused physical pain is healthy. Allowing healthy responses to this incident is a must! Acting like no physical pain occurred and you are not angry is unhealthy. People need to understand that allowing an emotional response to occur is healthy. Eventually, being able to break the incident down to the core emotions so you can feel them, react to them, and forgive yourself for reacting to them is a key factor in doing Shadow Work, which I call Subconscious Work. Forgiveness also includes the person that caused you harm or pain, but only if they acknowledge what they’ve done. Because forgiveness is for your healing not theirs. Subconscious work is for the real spiritual people, not the love and light folks, so if they don’t apologize or acknowledge their fault, f*** them and keep it moving.

I included forgiving yourself, because no matter how spiritually adept someone becomes, we will still be human at the end of the day. And being a human being includes being emotional and ignoring our emotions is harmful and unhealthy. It doesn’t help that society frowns upon emotional people, specifically women, and that’s why emotions and being emotional gets a bad rep. But as humans we are composed of 4 bodies, which are the spiritual body, mental body, emotional body, and the physical body. The saying “stand on your square” directly relates to the acknowledgment of these four bodies aka four points.

4 bodies: Spiritual, Mental, Emotional and Physical

I mentioned above the term core emotions which correlate to our core beliefs. People only have 5 emotions that we experience on a scale of extremes or as a combination of the core 5 emotions. Disney put out a great movie a few years back that explores human emotions and their complexity called Inside Out. I highly recommend watching this movie if you want to start Subconscious Work and fully understand core emotions and beliefs.

Unfortunately, because a lot of people including myself at one point, see 4 of our core emotions anger, fear, disgust, and sadness as negative emotions, but they’re not. They are absolutely needed and need to be expressed to be a whole and healthy human being. These emotions that are associated with being dark and negative are the key emotions you focus on in Subconscious/Shadow Work. These dark emotions have dark positives, which I see as positive aspects to that emotion when its acknowledged and transmuted. For example, fear can be transmuted into rage when a woman is attacked by an attacker while walking at night. She can use that fear turned rage to defend herself against her attacker. Another example, fear can be transmuted to strength when a mother see’s her child get trapped under a car and she lifts the car up off of her child so she can get them out.

To fully understand how the subconscious works, you must correlate it to how the body does voluntary and involuntary actions. Voluntary actions are conscious actions and involuntary actions are subconscious actions. So, for example, conscious breathing is voluntary breathing. You are purposely making you lungs inhale and exhale air. Subconscious breathing is involuntary breathing which is your normal moment to moment breathing that happens without any guidance or will of your own. Without involuntary actions of the body, we wouldn’t be alive because involuntary actions run our entire body. From breathing to blood pumping to digestion. All actions we don’t have to tell our bodies to do. So, guess what, if involuntary aka subconscious actions run our bodies then the subconscious mind runs our mental and emotional bodies. Need proof, here’s a perfect example, zoning out while driving a car to work. When, you get to work and don’t remember driving there at all. You don’t remember seeing the typical sites you see during the drive in or anything. It’s because your subconscious got you there and your subconscious always gets there but when you zone out and come back to consciousness you become aware of the subconscious actions.

Furthermore, the subconscious is the involuntary mental and emotional actions that drive our core emotions and beliefs. When we push “negative” or “dark” emotions and experiences “deep inside” so we don’t have to deal with the feelings that arise or even acknowledge them at all is unhealthy. When you push those emotions “deep inside” you’re pushing them into your subconscious. Which is where they turn into involuntary actions that attach to core emotions or core beliefs, which the subconscious runs them. So, now you have that one horrible moment that happened when you were 5 years old running and controlling your life when anything that feels like that experience or emotions happen. You’ve created a circular habitual response in your life that will continue till you deal with the emotions attached to that experience. Dealing with those emotions includes revisiting that event in your mind or even the place, allowing the emotions to rise, feeling those emotions play out, releasing the emotions, then forgiving yourself for allowing yourself to feel because “You’re human and you’re allowed.”

December 21, 2020

As this day approaches, I would like to declare myself as in full servitude and gratitude. To publicly accept my purpose and fulfill my role as a beacon of light and a walking portal of truth. To walk my true path as a being of light from beyond this realm and universe.

I will explore and research all that is needed to share truths and reset people’s frequencies to their true state of being. I will incorporate light and sound frequencies within myself so I can set forth these frequencies into others.

My search for my truths has paid off and I’m honored to have been chosen to be a part of this mission. By accepting my true nature, I bring honor, truth and resolved karmas to the ancestral line I’m currently incarnated in. As I fulfill my heavenly and earthly role, I bring back into remembrance the ways of our ancestral past, link our heritage, reveal knowledge, wisdom and practices and awaken the magic within us.

I accept my multidimensional selves that include: Indigo, Priestess of the Serpent, Atlantean, Egyptian, Sekhmet, Regal, Anuba, Sobek, Anuket, Feathered Serpent Dragon, Anubis, Ptah, Yemaya, Lion, koala, owl, snake, Algonquin, celestial, Cygnus, Lyran, Sirian, Centurian, Orion, Russian, Zeta, South African, Nigerian/Cameroon, Sudan, Hebrew, Moor, Turkish, Serbian, Australian, Lilith, Andromedan, emanation of chokmah, elemental worker, revealer, dream maker, mother, sister, daughter, friend, wife.

Blessed and so it be. Ase’!

DECODED: Black is King – Part 1

The presence of the Dogon tribe from the beginning of the video and throughout is the link to the Sirius beings creating the melanated hu-man. A physical being that can absorb hues aka colors aka all the wavelengths aka all the frequencies to be able to tap into the god frequencies. On the physical side, melanin can absorb the rays of the sun aka the radiation emitting from the sun. Melanin is an energy converting material similar to chloroplast in plants. The sun is an energy source for melanated people; hence why we were created to be able to be on the surface of earth. On the spiritual side, the colors aka frequencies are the 7 main chakras in the body; which each resonates at a different frequency. When each are opened and attuned they create a spiraling portal, the kundalini energy/serpent energy that rises from the base of our body out of the crown of our head. When our portal is open we can connect with the different frequencies present on the different dimensional states of existence. Hu-man is a being that is of the physical and spiritual worlds, a walking portal, a multidimensional being.

The blue man in the beginning is a Sirian man. The Blue hominid beings are a race of the Sirius star system. The color green and the green man represents Sirians and their green blood. Osiris was green because he was a sirian being and sirians have Cooper-base blood. When cooper oxidizes it turns green, hence oxidized copper-based blood does the same. Depending of the lighting used the sirian man looks blue, green or turquoise, regardless of what color scheme his skin is displaying it still doesn’t change the fact he is a sirian. Which correlates to no matter how light or dark your melanated skin is your origins are still of Sirius.

“Osiris”

I have to mention this because it was through out the video but I will have to decode it in more depth in a separate post. Cat prints, lions on the wall, and using the Lion King as the story base of the video can be broken into so many different aspects and representations. One aspect is showing the feline races of the Sirian star system and their bloodline on earth. Those bloodlines being of the 12 tribes of Jacob in the tribe of Judah, the tribe of the lion.

The red in the video represents 2 key aspects Venus and blood. All female goddesses are linked to Venus and Venus energy is the divine feminine as a whole. The women dressed in red suits is a power statement within this patriarchal society, “we carry the power in our blood”. The power of our blood is the divine feminine creation energy.

An image of the orbit pattern of Venus around the sun

Hot pink/bright magenta in the video represents Mary Magdalene energy, an aspect of Sophia energy. Sophia energy is the feminine divine aspect of the kryst consciousness. Kryst consciousness is the dual aspect that is our direct line of communication to the divine source. This feminine aspect must join with the divine masculine aspect Christos via merging/marriage. The marriage scene represented you becoming whole when you merge with your divine masculine and divine feminine selves. Its an internal spiritual merging and a physical merging when u find your partner that completes you. The king and the woman wearing magenta represented his and hers Sophia and kryst energies merging when they found each other and decided to partner aka become one. Beyoncé was there representing the divine feminine/creation energy, that’s why she wasn’t the one marrying the king. https://ascensionglossary.com/index.php/Christos-Sophia

Auset/Isis and Maat was present at the merging aka marriage too. They were the women who look identical with the Kemetician style hair with one wearing blue/Maat/laws and balance and the other wearing red/Auset/Isis/Venus helping the bride get ready. They also represent the power behind Osiris aka a pharaoh aka a king. In murals, Auset/Isis and Maat are always behind Osiris or a pharaoh. They can’t rule without Maat and Auset’s guidance, power, wisdom, strength and their direct connection to creation/source. More importantly, with Osiris/a king/a man in front of them, he is able to fulfill his role as a protector and protect his Auset/Isis/queen and the precious possessions she holds. This is also ties to one of the reasons why the chess board was used through out the video. In chess, the most dominant chess piece isn’t the king, it’s the queen. The most powerful being on earth is the melanated woman aka the queen and she most be protected at all times.

Maat and Auset behind Osiris

The African flag colors of green, red and black represents our origins. Our sirian green blood and our Venusian red blood are the powers in the black/melanated hu-man blood. The merging of the green man and the red woman creates the black hu-man. The phrase “power in the blood” has everything to do with our DNA and genetic origins.

Water, water, water everywhere! In the video she explains the importance of water but what she doesn’t illuminate on is water represents plasma, the 4th state of matter and our spiritual selves. Plasma is also in our blood, hence the phrase blood plasma and why it’s more precious than our blood cells. Plasma is the foundation of our blood, the matter that fills the space between our blood cells to give the appearance of fluidity. Without plasma our blood cells couldn’t sustain nutrients, move freely through our veins, etc. The universe is nothing but plasma that we can’t see with our visible eyes and scientists recently discovered it and call it dark matter. When you look at the night sky you see distance in between the stars. You presume the distance between the objects in the sky have a “nothingness” space between them. But that’s false, we can’t see with our physical eyes the matter that fills that distance/space between objects. Plasma is the matter that fills the space between all objects. Marvel movies such as Guardians of the Galaxy depict space as a “water” state when people are in it; hence why they look like they’re under water. So water everywhere in the video also represents our unseen connection and ties to all. Also represents that our purest state is our spiritual self/our plasma body, not our physical body. Wash away the false life, oppression, the heartache, the lessons of life and remember you’re more than those moments. You’re infinity and only enduring these things for a moment on your timeline of existence.

“Dark Matter” viewed in a wavelength outside of visible light. It is the network throughout the universe that connects all things
A scene from the Guardians of the Galaxy of Starlord floating in space

Part 2 coming soon. In the mean time don’t take my above words as truth, research everything I’ve stated and learn via your own wisdom and understanding. And remember that symbols and symbolism have multiple levels of meaning so use your own discernment.

Love Spell

Being apart of several “witchy” groups, I’ve noticed the main thing girls in these groups want to do is cast love spells on guys. Or hex or curse a guy that hurt them but that’s a subject for another blog. I can admit that I’ve never wanted to “cast” a love spell, mainly because I didn’t know what love really was. My definition of love was completely different from everyone I’ve ever encountered. My definition of love is “Love is a choice, not a feeling.” I’ve never came across anyone that valued the love that I gave. So my perspective on love was that it wasn’t for me and it was nothing but heartache, because I expressed love differently than others.

While dating a guy a long time ago, we was having a discussion on love and commitment and I told him my definition and he got upset. He couldn’t grasp my perspective on love. He was offended that I was saying that I could fall out of love with him. In my defense, I reinteriated my point that my love for someone would be a choice and not based on how I felt towards them, because feelings can change in a blink of an eye. Then to make matters worse, he tried to convince me that it was his job to make me happy and keep me in loving feelings towards him. Unfortunately, he was talking to the new, improved and awakened me and not the old, insecure, didn’t know my worth me. The old me would have soaked those words up and entrapped me, but the new me wasn’t having it. I responded with “I’m responsible for my own happiness and you the same. You should enhance me and I the same to you.” Welp, he wasn’t having that and I completely understood why. Most people base their value on someone else’s value and need of them. Tit for tat relationships, I give you this and you better give me what I gave you back at equal or greater value. I was a culprit of this myself in many of relationships, but the difference in my circumstances was that I was given way too much of myself to try to keep people happy with me. I put my self-worth on how I made others happy in hopes they would reciprocate the same effort towards me and that never happened till now.

After taking time to heal after a terrible marriage, a stressful divorce and converting back into single mommy hood, I focused a lot of free time on my spiritual journey. While on this part of my journey, the universe threw some tests at me to see if I’ve learned my lessons. One was the guy I mentioned earlier, another was an old flame and the last was a really nice guy that I gave a chance because my intuition said do it. The guy I mentioned above tested my ability to stand in my true feelings even when it conflicted with the person I’m dating. The old flame came back to remind me that I was above the bullshit and that it is ok to be better or above someone. To know my worth! The really nice guy was my test to go outside the box of the typical guys I dated to show me there’s more to life when you remove unnecessary boundaries. Also, to test me in my truth of being a magical, gifted being that was no longer trapped in religion. The really nice guy was a church guy that lived a contradicting lifestyle but had a problem with me embracing my spiritual path. It was hard but I chose my true nature over him and it was the final test I needed to past for the universe to show me I was ready to accept my god hood.

In January 2019 I did a love spell and it was nothing like any love spell I came across in groups or doing searches on the internet. My love spell was intuitive and about me accepting my divinity and letting the universe know I was ready to receive the love it had for me. I placed my life in the hands of the universe and wrote my spell to fall within universal laws, even if the love I attracted was me loving myself solo. This spell was so powerful that the notebook I wrote it in disappeared. I tried to keep the spell so I could reference it later but the universe was like “Naw, you gave this to us so it has to leave you to fully be in our hands.” From that day forward I continued to live, explore my spiritual journey and didn’t even think about the work I did with that spell.

Before I even did the spell work, I had arranged a cabin trip within a Facebook group for the end of February 2019. So, the Friday of the cabin trip arrived and I didn’t even pay attention to the date 2/22/19 (222). When I arrived a girl named Amber and a guy I’ve never met before greeted me at the door. The first thing I noticed when I opened the door was this guy with this huge smile stirring at me all googly. I could tell he was “intrigued” by me but I brushed it off because I know I have that effect on guys. So how he was acting wasn’t odd or worth paying attention to. Once inside he offers to take my bag, like he switched from intrigued mode to servitude mode. So I let him take my bag and I followed both of them upstairs. While walking to meet everybody that was already there, I’m videotaping the cabin because it was awesome. So I’m not paying this guy any attention while we’re walking. We get upstairs and he starts to walk up these loft steps to a room he said was mine and I stopped him. I let him know I didn’t want that room because it was too open and noisy and I wanted a room away from everybody. So he takes me around this bin to a whole other part of the house to a room away from everybody. I tell him cool I’ll take this one and he looks at me and this was the first time I made eye contact with him and he replies “but this is my room.” We locked eyes and it was like we spoke telepathically because I was thinking “that’s nice but I want this room” and he responded verbally “ok you can have it.”

After that interaction, I found myself drawn to him. Yes he was cute, had a nice body, gorgeous smile, you know all the physical things opposite sex are attracted to but it wasn’t that I was drawn to. I found myself wanting to be in his presence and had to stop myself from stirring at him. Every now and then I would catch him stirring at me then quickly turning his head or eyes away like he wasn’t too. At dinner I put my glass next to where he was going to sit but a girl moved it and sat next to him not realizing my glass of water was my spot saver. Later that night we were all in the jacuzzi and we were the last ones to get out. He tried to have a conversation with me but it was forced and awkward. I started to take that weird interaction as maybe what I was feeling wasn’t what I thought it was towards him.

Then things took a turn for the better later that night. We created a bond over spying on the weird owner of the cabin we was staying at. To the point I screamed for him to join me at a window and all he had on was his boxers. Till this day I’m shocked that we spent hours together spying on this guy and not once did I notice he was in his boxers. We were so wrapped up in each other’s company, laughing and joking around I never noticed and he never thought to go put some shorts on. Later on finding out what he was working with, I definitely should of have noticed! The most memorable part of the spying was when I was sitting on a chair and he came and sat down on a foot stole to be close to me while we chatted. There was a couch and another chair he could of chose to sat on but he sat on the foot stool. The way he was looking at me when he was listening to me was so adorable. Like I was the most beautiful, intriguing woman he had ever seen. He still looks at me like that and expresses his amazement of me everyday. Once we had enough of spying on the owner, we went to sleep in our separate rooms. That night I ended up having a dream that revealed that he was the one for me, my soul mate. The rest of that weekend we were inseparable, where ever I was he was. When we didn’t know where one of us was we would ask someone where the other is.

We became an immediate couple and been making couple moves ever since. At times I would say I wish I met him in my younger years, but I know all the things I’ve gone through prepared me for having him in my life. The connection and bond we have is what movies are made of. But not the typical love movie, I’m talking about a supernatural, superhuman sci-fi love movie. Our connection is so strong and we’re so intuned that we finish each others thoughts and sentences. We can send thoughts to each other and we will respond via text or phone. We know when one is off and exactly what to do to make the other feel better. During sex this man knows secrets held within my body that he maneuvers like he was the one that placed them there. He completely understands my definition of love and our roles as a man and woman in a partnership. He fully fulfills his role as a protector and I as my role as a nurturer. In regards to our god hood, he is my generator and I am is manifestation vessel. He allows me to be the magical being that am, practice my spirituality as I see fit and inquires to learn more about my practices. The perfect guy for me!

My love spell was open-ended and written to work within universal laws; which released full control to the universe to work on my behalf. I loved myself first and that was the key to attracting someone who loved me too. He is the best person and partner for me based on my authentic, true self. And You can also attract the person that is for you by being who you truly are too.

Dear Diary – Entry #3

6/3/2020 – 2nd day of a 7 day Releasing and Cleansing Bath Ritual

Meditated after finishing immersions. I the wanted to go to zero void, so I seek out the void and ended up at the dark throne outside the universe. My skin was blue black and I was humongous. My body became All. I can see the arm of the dark throne threw my arm and can see the outline of my arm at the same time. My arm and legs body was one with the universe. My body was reflective of the universe. I was the universe and the universe was me….One. Then I decided to get up and walk around the throne to explore the area because I never have. I’ve always come to the dark throne and just sat on it but since I was controlling this meditation I decided to explore. The ground was dark and rocky, like a dessert rocky terrain. Standing behind the throne I could see the explosions happening in the far off distance of the universe. Then I kicked the dark throne and saw that it sat on top of a dark rocky sphere as it moved away from me. The force from the kick forced me backwards into a white space beyond the void that was the beginning point of the universe. In this white space it wasn’t really white, it’s staticky like a black and white tv. As I looked closer the static is 0 1 code moving rapidly. “See through the code”, just like Neo in the matrix. See the space within the space. I started to see my universe body as atoms, the space with the space. The code that creates all. As I pulled myself back into the void I could see the code that made up the universe. The white space behind me appeared as a bright room behind a “curtain of universe”. As I turned away the curtain closed showing me that I got to see behind the veil. I could see the code in the universe explosions. I used my hand to push on the code and thought mountain and out came a mountain. I pushed on the code in another place, thought Eiffel tower and saw the Eiffel tower. I called on the guardian of the dark throne and saw he was made of the “guardian” code. Then I went to earths sun and saw the code that made up the sun. Then I wanted to see the code of earth and saw the barrier around earth and noticed dark 0s & 1s in the code and started to remove them or tap them to turn gold. Then I wanted to see myself and see my code. I came upon myself in the tub and thought “see the code” and I code see dark 0s & 1s in parts of my aura. So I decided to do a scan to remove the dark codes and as I started to remove the dark codes and tap some to turn gold it was like a warning alarm went off. A swirl of dark grayish black spiral swirl of matter began flowing out of me. My body started to tingle and I started to feel fear. So I forced myself to not fall into fear and retreat. As I stayed in the moment I was being forced by this grayish matter to come out of meditative state. The alarm red color started to overcome me as the gray black matter spread so wide it blocked me from seeing myself in the tub. My third eye started to glitch. So I grabbed hold of the gray black matter and started to pull it off of me and slung it beyond the barrier of earth. Then I went back to myself and pulled off a layer of gray matter off my aura and threw it beyond the barrier. Then I started to tap gold the dark 0 & 1 codes, “turn gold”. Then I started to feel tingly in my shoulders and back of neck. I went in and pulled from the back of my neck where the bone protrudes a scorpion 🦂 looking parasite from there. I smashed it in my hands and threw it beyond the barrier. I finished turning my aura gold then I made myself invisible. I checked my invisibility status several times and I could not see myself but could see the bathtub with the water, the candle and crystals there. I left myself and went beyond the barrier, grabbed the gray black matter, gray matter and the parasite and threw it in the sun to dissolve it. Then I went back to the dark throne, checked in on myself and I was still invisible. Could only see the tub and what not. Then I started saying OM internally in the tub to solidify the cleanse, said thank you and came back to.

Sister Energies

During a meditation last night, I was told by Sekhmet and Inanna to find their sisters. I’ve been trying to figure out how this information related to me. Being told by both to find their sisters, then pulling oracle cards as an added confirmation gave me the connection I needed. See, I’ve been pulling Work Your Light “Sisterhood of the Rose” oracle card for months now and I initially thought I was being pushed to start a “sisterhood” of like minded women in the 3D and that could be the case. But when it comes to spiritual matters there’s always levels of understanding. The level of sisterhood revealed to me last night has to do with my primordial self, my highest of highs self.

The Rose is the symbol for Venus due to its orbit pattern resembling a rose

To set the scene for this epiphany, I need to take you back to 2018. I was initiated by Sekhmet in Nov 2018 during a meditation and I was initially initiated as her daughter. I’ll write about that experience in a separate blog at a later time, because it was wild! Since that initiation I’ve been trying to understand the next course of action I’m supposed to take with Sekhmet. Then, 2 weeks ago I did a Sekhmet guided meditation and I was taken to the desert, to her temple within the Temple of Karnak. While in her presence I was told that I was her and she is me. We are the same energy, the same blood, we are sisters. A course I was puzzled by this and asked Sekhmet how am I a sister but was a daughter last year. Her reply was that I have graduated to sister because I’ve grown so much into my true self since then. After asking Sekhmet some more questions, she told me to have a ceremony at 2:22am the next night; which fell on May 7th the Flower Full Moon. I was directed to wear a gold jewel over my 3rd eye region, a red dress, the same oil I put in my spiritual bath, to burn the flowers from my spiritual bath and use the same crystals. The next night I woke up at 2:15am, got set up on my back porch in the cold of the night and followed through with the ceremony Sekhmet requested me to do. By embracing Sekhmet, I finally embraced the true me and now I am tasked with tying all of my lineage together.

Temple of Karnak
Pharaohs Temple

Last night during another Sekhmet guided meditation, I as Sekhmet attended a council meeting with the head Kemetian gods and goddesses. Present there was Osiris, Auset, Anubis, Maat, Horus, Thoth, Sebek and a monkey god. The meeting took place on a different plane within the Pharaohs Temple in Egypt. The room setting with myself and all the gods reminded me of the painting “Ancestors in Conference”. While at this meeting, Osiris states that the Anunnaki want to meet then the wall becomes the universe with the Milky Way ban in view. The universe connects with the fountain that is in the room and becomes a “universe” bridge and down the bridge comes Anu and Inanna. I couldn’t fully make out the face or body of Anu but knew it was him and I couldn’t fully see Inanna’s full face and length of her body but I knew it was her. As Inanna gets closer to the room I, Sekhmet, run over to her and yell “Sister” as we embraced in a joyous hug and smiled at each other. The union was as if we haven’t seen each other in a very, long time. Inanna is a beautiful black woman with green fluorescent reptilian eyes, and wavy 3C hair.

Anu begins to speak and states, “We are one in the same, given dominion over different regions. We need to make this known that we are one in the same. No pantheon/cluster of gods are better or greater than the other. It’s time to come together and let them know”. While Anu is speaking I, Sekhmet and Inanna are still holding hands and our outer appearance keep cycling between our original selves (Sekhmet with golden fur to black jaguar fur and Inanna with brown skin to green scaly reptilian skin) to metallic gold bodies. After Anu finishes his statement, I start hearing “find my sisters” over and over. Then as I saw the statement “daughters of Eve.” Then the imagery of the room changed and I was in a circle around Venus/Sun (it looked like Venus and the sun were one, cycling from red to yellow spewing out energetic flames) with my cosmic sisters. We were all holding hands and I had Inanna on my left and a Japanese goddess on my right. When the Japanese goddess first arrived to the room she was in the form of a dragon and I’m thinking how is holding hands going to work with her. Then she morphed into a woman dressed in red attire covering her breast area and a long slit skirt with her belly region exposed, a dangly bejeweled veil over her nose and mouth region, and a fanned out hair piece resembling sun rays. She reminded me of one of the Mortal Kombat girl fighters. Then as she approached the circle her attire turned white. Also, in the circle was Kali, the Jaguar Queen, Aphrodite and 2 others I couldn’t make out. As we’re holding hands, gold energy builds between our palms and in our heart region. Our clothes and hair are moving like we are in a high wind energy vortex created by us and the planet Venus.

After coming out of this amazing experience, I then began my challenge of finding my sisters. We are all one and the same. The same energy expressed differently from the divine creator…..making us sisters. Our sisterhood will tie together how the Anunnaki, Hindu Deities, Kemetic/Egyptian Deities, Aztec/Mayan Deities, Japanese Deities, Grecian Deities, etc are one in the same. A cluster of divine deities assigned to different regions of this Earth to influence, rule, mold, etc. as they saw fit. Depending on the region of “assignment” these deities either created the culture or absorbed into the culture. As we’ve seen in history, humans have a tendency to rename, adopt or eliminate deities to fit their agenda.

Inanna
Sekhmet

Dear Diary – Entry #2

The below drawing is my very first “journal” entry I made when I started writing down my thoughts and documenting my visions, dreams and meditations. I don’t know why I drew it, it was just something that came through while I was doodling trying to figure out what to start the notebook off with. After I was done drawing it made complete sense that it represented me at that moment.

12/4/2016

Drawing Analysis: I was thinking Jupiter but drew Saturn and this mix up happens all the time with me regarding these planets. Later I would learn about the significance of both planets in relation to myself and their interactions with each other. Jupiter being the benevolent planet and Saturn being the malevolent planet. Polarities, Enki and Enlil.

Moon and sun being polarities and very prominent in my being. I’m a solar creature but also a moon child. I gain my power and stability from both the sun and the moon. I absorb the sun for my physical nutrients and the moon for my spiritual nutrition. Moon being feminine and the sun being masculine, magnetic and electric selves represented.

The star is my 3rd eye and I drew both physical eyes and 3rd eye wide open which they’ve always been.

My mind (upper self) on the stars, the universe, the heavenly bodies. My mouth (lower self) in paradise, exploring nature and speaking with the natural orders.

The Space Between Us

Dark matter, the unseen cosmic web of the universe.

Space is a play on our senses and perception. The shortest distance between two objects is a straight line, a direct path. The area between those 2 objects is called space. From what we’ve been taught in school and generally in society is that space is an empty open area, nothing special about it at all. Air fills the open area between objects on land and in lakes and oceans water fills in the open area between objects. Flat out, we were taught wrong! Not per se on purpose but due to no one ever wondering what the space between us really is. Assumptions were made, majority of the population agreed to them and it became a fact that space is open area. But now scientist have discovered that there is something that makes up the space between us. To better understand this concept of what space truly is we have to look at it in the perspective of “as above so below, as within so without”.

As above so below, as within so without is a very simple way of understanding how we work as humans within this universe. We as humans are a smaller version of the universe. I will not dive into this concept right now, but I will use the general overlay to explain my thoughts on the space between us. The human body is made up of cells and when those cells are differentiated, they create our organs. Those organs then operate off of the nervous system to perform their duties voluntary and involuntary. With each organ, tissue and cell coming together and working in complete harmony, they create a functioning human body. Now, what is holding all these cells, tissues, and organs in place in the body? Why aren’t they moving all freely around in us? Well, the organs in our bodies are held together by a web of connective tissues, which keeps our organs from moving out of place. Cells forming tissues are held together by cell to cell adhesion called gap junctions, which are proteins that bond the cells together. This allows fluidity to occur and the perception of solidarity. The human body doesn’t have space or open areas in it, ever crevice is filled with some type of fluid, gas or connective tissues. Even when we think there’s space somewhere in the body, for example our intestines, it is occupied with gas.

The universe is just like the structuring of the human body, regarding there are no open areas. Scientist called the area outside and surrounding Earth outer space because that’s what their senses perceived the areas as. Through their own eyes and telescopes, they saw long distances of open space between stars, planets and galaxies and assumed that the space was empty. But that perception has changed with the use of telescopes that use higher frequencies of the electromagnetic spectrum that fall outside of the visible light spectrum range.

Electromagnetic Spectrum is the range of frequencies of electromagnetic radiation and their respective wavelengths and photon energies.

Visible light is a very, very tiny section on the electromagnetic spectrum, so any frequency above the color purple and below the color red we cannot see with our 2 physical eyes. When scientist started using frequencies outside of the visible light spectrum range, they started to be able to see the universe in a whole new way. Dark areas of space actual had stars, black holes became visible and the open areas between objects are actually connected by a web of material they call “dark matter”. Since scientists don’t know how it works, what its made of or really anything about it they named it dark matter. Not only is dark matter invisible to our senses, it doesn’t operate like any other material known. Objects move freely through it like its not even there and it doesn’t reflect but absorbs energy like a black hole. Scientist via the CERN project began performing experiments on dark matter and recently discovered that within dark matter is dark energy aka the “God Particle”. These scientist are correlating dark energy to the beginning of All and I agree. Their search for answers is bringing them closer to understanding truth and they haven’t even realized it yet.

While studying the mystical kabbalah a particular lesson stood out to me, the lesson on the decision of Creator Source to start creating and experiencing. Creator Source couldn’t just create from itself to experience because then it would have say so in everything created under it. It would know every move, thought and direction beforehand because that’s what Creator Source is, nothing and everything…..the see all, know all, is all. So, to truly be able to experience, Creator source had to create separately from itself, hence the creation of the void. And how do we know this? Through symbolism and the symbol that holds this magnificent truth (drum roll)…..the Target sign, which is the dot within 2 circles. The information I received during an alpha wave deep thought session explains the symbol as such; the outer circle being Creator Source, the inner circle being the space between Creator Source and the dot represents the void. The space between Creator Source and the void; which all creation was created from, is dark matter the unseen web that connects all.

Target symbol – a dot within 2 circles

The space between me and an object or person or animal is a false perception to make us seem separate from each other. Dark matter connects us metaphysically but separates us perspectively. The unseen web of dark matter is our connection to each other, to all things and to the Creator Source.